4332 Miles

A lot of stuff is going on since I moved to Orlando. I’m still getting used to the heat (yes, I know… poor German who’s only used to rather cold weather at this time of the year), I’m getting used to my schedule still (like, I get home and I’m exhausted and all I want is sleep), I’m recovering from being sick the last three days and on my days off, I’m usually doing something.

Yesterday was my nine month’ anniversary with my girl! Nine months already, wow! Even though we had a lot of bumps in our road and a lot of fights, my love for her has only grown… I’m so grateful that I found her and that I have her in my life.

On that note… she’s visiting me this weekend! I’m so happy! I thought the next time I would see her would be during my birthday! I can’t wait! She’s going to pick me up from work and then we’re going to eat at Planet Hollywood (on Saturday), on Sunday I changed my shift so that I have the whole day to spend with her which means we go to Universal and afterwards we’ll watch Titanic 3D, Monday will just be some relaxing before work and on Tuesday she has to leave again… unfortunately…

At the moment, things are a little hard… as much as I love my girl, we always seem to end up in fights. There might be a day or two when everything’s okay but it only needs one little thing and one of us starts fussing…

I honestly believe that it’s the distance getting to us… I mean, we spent seven weeks together and then I had to go back to Germany for a month before I got to Florida. In that month when I was back at home, we fought a lot, too and I really hoped that it would get better the moment I would get to be closer to her. Sure, it’s still quite a distance, South Carolina - Florida… but it’s much better than having an ocean between us, that’s what I thought.

But it seems like now that we know that we’re closer, that we’re in the same country, on the same Coast, in the same timezone…. that it’s even harder. And it doesn’t help that our work schedules collide with each other…

I really hope, that when she comes here next month, everything will get better - though to be honest, I have the feeling that it can get even worse…. She’ll come here for a few days and then she has to go back and then we’ll see each other again at the end of June - my birthday. While I know that we’re lucky to get to see each other that “often”, it’s still hard…. I want to believe that these are just some bumps in the road that we have to fight until everything gets better…

I’m trying to get deeper into Disney - trying to show what I’m capable of and hoping that they will offer me another job after that year… This way I would be able to stay here and the future would be a lot easier…

We’ll see…

Sorry for being absent for this long… I’m still settling in and getting used to everything here in Orlando…

And second: MY GIRL COMES TO VISIT ME NEXT MONTH! … WHICH IS MUCH EARLIER THAN I THOUGHT! I AM SO HAPPY ABOUT THIS! SERIOUSLY!

And no, I’m not sorry for the capslock :D

(And I’m trying to get online more often again… :) )

I’m just in moving stress. Tomorrow morning I’m going to leave for FL and I can’t wait! Finally, I’ll be able to get a phone on which I can call/message my girl without having to pay too much because it’s a call/message to a different country/continent.

Today, I’m doing the rest of packing and tomorrow I’ll be travelling all day long (my journey will be at least 25 hours long, probably longer). So sorry for my absence!

I thought about how much has changed within a year.
At this point, last year, I didn’t have any strength to go on anymore. All that counted was somehow getting through the day and somehow waking up again (though it wouldn’t have made any difference if I wouldn’t have woken up again - that’s what I thought back then). I was at a really low point.

But then I joined this one rp-group on Facebook, in the end of February/beginning of March and I got to meet amazing people and without them, I don’t know where I would be today. Maybe, I would still live my dull life, not caring about anything. I call these people my friends now - I might not have met all of them by now but yes, they are my friends. The closest I have, actually. They helped me several times and one of these friends became somehow so much more. I never felt like this before… it was that spark which I also frowned over when local people I know talked about it. I would have never thought that this “spark” could be real, I was sure that people just exaggerated a bit to make everything sound romantic. I had a boyfriend before but I never felt something like this with him. I was also actually okay going a week or more without having any contact to him…

But with her, it was (and still is) different. I can’t go a day without talking to her, it hurts not being able to have her with me because we’re trapped on different continents (for now). And I’m so lucky that I got to meet and stay with her for seven weeks. I wouldn’t have thought that this time would just deepen the feelings even more - because I didn’t believe that my feelings could even grow stronger. She literally means the world to me.

This girl is my girlfriend.

I love you!

Distance 4332 miles but in 10 days 540

About You ——————————

 What is your name? Nay

How old are you? 20

Where do you live?  Germany and in 10 days I live in Florida

What do you look like? Uhm… I posted some photos somewhere on this blog…

———————
About Them

You have a significant other, right? Yep, otherwise I wouldn’t do this survey

What’s their name? Leigh

How old are they? 24

Where do they live? South Carolina

What do they look like? There are also some pics of here somewhere here :)

———————————- About The Relationship

Since you’re taking this, it’s a long-distance relationship, right? Yes.

Did you meet through the internet? *nods*

If not, then how did you meet?  /

How often do you see them? I only saw her once in real life by now after 5 months of waiting, next time I’ll probably only see her on my birthday again which is another 4 months from now.

How long have you been together?  Seven months and two weeks exactly.

————————————————-When Was The Last Time You …

saw them? In real life… 31th of January, the day I left. Via Skype, a few days ago.

kissed them? 31th of January

hugged them? 31th of January

talked to them? I’m talking to her right now.

had sex with them? Uhm… *blush* I don’t remember when exactly but it was within the last two weeks of my stay…. I guess…

———————————
Some Other Questions

What made you decide you wanted to be in a long-distance relationship? I never decided to be in a long-distance relationship. My significant other just happens to live right across the ocean…

How does it usually make you feel? Mostly, I just want to be able to be with her. Sometimes it’s unbearable, it makes me feel insecure because I can’t be with her. But she’s worth it.

Are there any songs that remind you of them? We have some songs. Our “main theme” is For Good from Wicked.

Ever feel unable to believe you’re in a real relationship because of it? No, never. I don’t have to always see my girl to know I’m in a relationship with her - though I would prefer being with her of course. But it never made me doubt the real-ness of what we have.

Do you ever feel angry or stressed because of the distance? Yes… sometimes…

Do you ever take it out on your significant other? *sighs* Unfortunately yes. I try not to but sometimes I just can’t help it… and it makes me feel bad.

Are you ever jealous of local couples? So/so. I wish I could be with my girl when I see other couples but… I’m trying not to think too much about it.

What are the advantages of a long-distance relationship? I really think you get to know that person better. You talk way more because that’s all you can do. You fall in love with who the person is.

What are the disadvantages? I can’t be there for her when she needs me. I can’t just kiss her when I feel like it or fall asleep. The physical contact is missing.

Do people have less faith in your relationship because of the distance? Luckily, I only have supportive friends.

Do you know when the next time you’ll see them is? In person, 27th of June latest. Via Skype: I don’t know… we don’t really skype anymore.

How do you usually talk to them? MSN or Skype.

Has the distance helped your relationship at all? Hmm… that’s a hard question… I don’t know… I guess it helped me meeting her. Since there are four years between us, I don’t know if we would’ve met/talked if we would live in the same town/city.

If so, in what ways? Uhm, I just answered that lol.

Do you find it hard to trust your significant other? No, I trust her.

Have you, or your significant other, ever taken advantage of the distance and lied? No.

———-
Future

Do you ever hope to live with your significant other?  Yes. If everything works out, we might move in together in about a year if I get into college.

Do you hope to marry them? Yes, one day. I just hope that by then, marrying her will be legal in more States/countries.

Do you hope to have kids with them? Well, we talked about it and we would like to have/adopt two kids.

Do you think it’d be strange to finally have them with you, permanently? No, I lived with her for seven weeks and it was the best time and I just felt right.

Do you think there’s a chance of this happening? Yes, we’re optimistic about that happening.

How often do you cry over it? Often. Because as much as I believe that one day, we live together, there is still so much that can go wrong…

Would you ever break up with them because of the distance? Never. I would never want to lose her and especially not because of the distance. I honestly believe that “distance” is just a momentary problem that will be solved within the future.

What keeps you from ending it all? Duh, I’m not even thinking about ending it. I love her too much.

————- Finishing

Overall, are you happy you’re in the relationship? Yes, she’s the best that happened to me. Of course, sometimes it’s hard and there are fights and jealousy but which relationship doesn’t have that?

Any advice for others in your situation? Never give up. As long as both of you love each other, you will overcome the distance and pain that goes with it. Sure, it’s not the easiest kind of relationship and you have to miss out on a lot of things but if everything works out in the end, you’ll have the partner of your life - maybe even the perfect person for you. Personally, I couldn’t even imagine, breaking up with her for a local relationship because there is no one like her. I want her, no one else.

Until the distance between us goes from 4332 to about 540 miles! I can’t wait! Even though we probably won’t see each other again before my birthday in June… but still… at least we’ll be on the same continent, same country and in the same time zone!!

naysjournal:

The first time ever I saw your face
I thought the sun rose in your eyes
and the moon and the stars were the gifts you gave
to the night and the empty skies my love
to the night and the empty skies

- The first time ever I saw your face, Celine Dion

My girl will probably kill me when she sees that I’m in the mood for having this on this blog as well

I was looking through my main blog and found this post. I don’t know why I never posted this on here as well - especially because I planned on posting some of the pics - but yeah, here you go! This is my amazing girl!

Tonight (yes, for me it’s already “night”) is one of those nights where I miss her a lot more than normal. I just wish I could cuddle up with her and just get some rest. But I know, I have to wait  about four and a half months, until I see her again. It’s hard, yes… but she’s worth it. She’s worth so much! I’m incredibly lucky to be allowed to call her my girlfriend.

I love you!

My visa is approved and I’ll get it within the next 10 days which means, I’m flying to Orlando on the 6th of March, for my job at WDW.

I’ll also be much closer to my girl for a whole year! I’m so happy that everything worked out! And now I can’t wait for my birthday in June to arrive and to finally have her with me again!

Plus, I had a short talk with a German woman who studied in the USA and because she’s working at my godfather’s, she might be able to help me with the whole applying process! Which would mean, I’d get another 4-5 years in the States! :)

Have fun! :)